These past few weeks have been very strenuous to say the least. I’m sure you read about the passing of my friend and father figure, Adrian Stevenson. What you didn't know is that there was even more going on behind the scenes during that time than I even had the time to write about.
I'll never forget the day Adrian left this earth. I had planned to come visit him again that Wednesday night because I didn't want the last time I saw him in that hospice to be the last time I saw him amongst the living. Although I was still hoping and believing for a miracle, I knew the odds he had, and I understood that if it was God's will for Adrian’s time with us to come to an end I would have to prepare myself for that possibility as well.
When I got the call that morning warning me that he was having trouble breathing and we may not have much longer with him I asked to be put on speaker so that I could talk to him once more before it was too late.
Adrian was the type of person that would do anything for those he loved and I knew he loved me, and this organization, very much. I knew that he was fighting hard, even after being removed from life support several days earlier. I knew that it was very likely he was fighting so hard because he knew we wanted him to get better. All we'd been saying to him is how we still wanted him here and didn't want to lose him, but we hadn't thought about the pain he's experienced here and the fact that he may very well want to let go.
I could hear him over the phone painfully gasping for precious air. In those final moments, I told him that I understood if he was too tired and needed to go home to rest. I made sure he knew that he’d taught us well and his work will not have been in vain. I reassured him we would hold it down until we meet again. I said my last goodbye to this incredible angel God had blessed us to know and I asked him to put in a good word for me with Jesus when he got to the other side.
As hard as it was to do, I let Adrian go, knowing that he would be at peace and no longer homeless or suffering. He took his final breath just minutes later.
As if this day wasn't difficult enough already, that very night I get a phone call from the Sherrif's Department claiming that there was a warrant out for my arrest and I needed to turn myself in immediately. At first I thought this had to be a mistake but as I questioned the officer on the source of this "outstanding warrant" I was reminded how distractions often come as soon as we’ve made up our minds to give it our all and focus on what God has purposed us for. With that in mind I thought to myself, “this doesn’t surprise me at all”.
It never fails, every time I regain my focus and am determined to change the world with my organization, it's like the floodgates of hell open up and I'm overwhelmed with everything that could possibly stunt my progress or even cause me to want to give up.
Can you relate?
Without going into too much detail regarding these bogus charges; I want to make sure I get my point across and not go off on a tangent. I will say that the officer basically told me that the only option I had to get rid of this outstanding warrant was to go to jail and be bailed out. As I dug deeper with the help of various lawyers and friends I found out that these original allegations where much more serious than I'd thought and if I didn't get a lawyer to take care of it I could be looking at some serious time in prison.
Although the thought of possibly missing years of my children's lives was excruciating, I knew that this was not a coincidence that it just happened to come up the day of Adrian's passing. I don't believe in coincidence so I could only believe and rest assured that God was up to something.
After several hundred phone calls and finally securing a lawyer, I went down to the prison to do the inevitable. I didn't want this warrant, no matter how ridiculous it may be, to be looming as I was trying to prepare for the funeral services that Adrian's family had entrusted me to assist with. I wasn’t going to let anything interfere with Adrian’s service being everything we had in our power to make it, because he deserved the best.
I'd expected it would take a few hours to get processed and bailed out, but I didn't expect I'd come in first thing in the morning and not be free until later that night. I'd expected to be surrounded by cold hard criminals, but what I didn't expect was a room full of hurting women... mothers, young adults, many very scared, worried--unsure of what was going to happen to them next. Some admitted their crimes and poor judgment in their situation, others, like myself had no idea that a seemingly innocent act years ago would lead to where they were at the moment.
Once I was in the holding cell with about 30 other women, I realized very quickly that this day was not going to be anything like what I expected. Despite my own circumstance I did what I do best and set aside my own problems to focus on the other hurt souls in the room. I began to walk around and just ask God to use me in this situation.
As I was compelled to talk to each individual, each time I did, she began to poor her heart out and share her pain with me. I prayed with many of the women throughout the day. Other's that I didn't have a chance to pray with heard my prayers so I'm sure they were still touched by it in some way. I became excited, as what I had once thought would be an awful experience became the most amazing act of God I'd ever witnessed.
I entered the prison that day with a smile on my face because I was determined to trust God in the midst of it all. I left with the same smile on my face that I'd walked in with, except this time it was saying, “Look what God has done!”
I’ll be honest, I hesitated to write my blog about this today. Sometimes it’s hard to be an open book for fear of judgment and criticism, but we all have a testimony and this one in particular truly shows how God can use any situation or current circumstance to His Glory! So I came to the conclusion, and I’ll say the same to you… your testimony can’t help anyone if you keep it to yourself.
That one day I spent in a holding cell was probably the best day I’d had since the first day I went out into the parks feeding and loving on the homeless. It felt so good to be God’s useful vessel again and for what I thought would discourage me to have motivated me in such a way that I am on fire for God's purpose and plan.
I pray for each and every woman I met that day! I pray that their situations got resolved, lessons where learned, mercy and grace was granted… I pray that they leave their cells soon and with a sense of redemption. I pray that they know their worth and that they are so important that God saw fit to put me right where I needed to be just for them!
I will end by saying this… When you realize that your life is not your own and you become a living sacrifice, allowing and asking God to use you in every way, every day you are given, NOTHING CAN EVER HAPPEN TO YOU! Everything that happens from this point on will happen FOR YOU, WITH YOU, AND BECAUSE OF YOU! There is nothing that can go wrong because you understand that everything that God allows, even when it looks bad, if you allow Him, He will use it for your benefit and the benefit of those around you!
So understand that YOU are blessed and highly favored! Wherever you are, ask God, “how can I be of service even now, even in this”. Let him work your mess out and it become the greatest thing that’s ever happened FOR you!
NEWS UPDATE:
Adrian's "Celebration of Life" will be held on April 29th from 3pm-6pm in Hurt Park. Save the date & make plans to attend & show the community that we stand together for those hurting and in need! We are calling all organizations, ministries, churches, volunteers, etc. to participate and/or donate. Email thehomelesstour@gmail.com for more information or call (678) 709-8505.
You can also contribute by making a monetary contribution!
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